God damn debacle

I was thinking as I tend to do. I read this good book and without too many details it talks about some guy's life from time of dog purchase to time of dog death during which he gets married and has kids (3). So I was thinking about kids, because I want them (two boys, duh) and I realized something very important but then was lucky enough to realize that it wasn't that important because of another thing. And those things are:

1. I can never marry a woman who is smarter than me. luckily, this is impossible.
2. If by contrast to me my wife is 'dumb' then my kids might not be that smart.

but

3. My kids will be tall and play sports really well and thus don't need to be very smart.

All is well with the Cosmos.

Try to get some sleep...

You ever get the feeling where there is something on your mind but you can't quite put it to words, or rather, words don't do the feeling justice? Rather than confuse and compound the feeling I'm going to ride this bliss out instead of trying to elaborate and materialize my feelings. The month of August was a 360 for me. Or more like a 300- I wasn't quite facing the right direction after being spun in some many different ones. September, however, has turned out just about perfect and has been exactly what I needed. Man, my boys Outkast really knew what they were saying back in 1998 when they said, 'funny how shit comes together sometimes, ya dig?'

It's all coming together right now and yes, I dig. Anatomy test tomorrow and then it's up to Grand Maris for some good times. Holla

omg omg omg omg omg

so i might have just done something. i ordered a new ipod battery here: http://www.batteryship.com

and with the help of this http://eshop.macsales.com/tech_center/index.cfm?page=Video/ipod/3g/high.html

i am currently charging my ipod, with extended life battery, for $15. I have no idea if it worked yet- it's charging, that's all I know. Is the battery any good? is the ipod ok? does it play sexy music? I'll respond in a comment later- so come back! i am very pleased- try it, it's hard to do (the guy on the video makes it seem so simple but it was pretty hard and i was sure i broke my ipod multiple times.)

dream

i love office space however i don't think doing nothing is all it's cracked up to be. by doing nothing this summer i don't mean that i've been doing a few little things, staying busy, whatever. i mean i've done nothing and it's driving me crazy. Sure, i've been drunk running around downtown yelling at cop cars, but i'm talking about productivity, maturation, responsi-what?

c'mon bitches, 'tis me, sir lazy, mr. nada, etc. i don't 'do' shit in the same way that 'you' 'do' 'shit'. i wake up late, say noon. i have a bowl of cereal, read the newspaper cover (?) to cover (?) and then watch tv. there is always soccer on and for that i am thankful. then i go on a run and usually decide that i could be a professional soccer player. sometimes i kick a ball until i realize that i don't have the fancy cleats required for me to become as great as i would want to be so i drop the notion of wrecking the premier league. besides, if i went back to england it would be to play aeroball, my calling.

where am i? probably about 2 now and it's time for a long shower. see, rather than taking dial's suggestion of taking back the shower i've feminized my shower with silly body wash (and a poof thingy!) and i love it. i also shave my legs and wax my eyebrows. this takes me to 3pm, the lazy hour as i call it although it's really no different than any other time of day for me. Some days i'll read but usually i watch the clock- it's hours of fun! i also eat something, generally a muffin.

At this point my mom comes home from gallivanting around the planet and we take willie the beast out of his cage. i have to watch him to make sure he doesn't eat his bed, jay's desk, any chairs/furniture or my golf clubs. i usually take my socks off for this, otherwise he'll take those. after all this i certainly deserve dinner. if he's feeling feisty and it's hot perhaps i'll indulge in a cold samuel adams as i watch his wacky ways, all the while wondering why he chews his own legs (alternating legs because i think it hurts. yes, ups biology degree hard at work).

dinner is dinner and i'm not telling you what we had or you'd be jealous. it includes wine and food. that's all you need to know. oh, and willie eats the napkins of the entire family.

from this point on my night is just a foggy haze of binge drinking, recreational drug use, unprotected sex and watching the twins game. i usually pass out around 3am.

Home sweet home

It's summertime, look around you- the birds is chirpings, the flowers is bloomings and most importantly, i'm sleeping until noon. holla. My biggest concern is with this crazy dog we purchased, Willy (or Willard as I call him). He doesn't come out of his cage for anyone besides my mother- what gives? He must really hate me to not come out and eat food out of my hand. I don't get it, i'd eat food out of his hands. Anyway, I have been reading all these CIA/Iraq novels from this Minnesota author Vince Flynn since he is coming to talk in a couple days. They're really good/interesting/exciting and meeting the author and hearing him talk about the books, characters ought to be a fun experience. Hope you're swell, mofo.

April Poker

This is my best month, but I've also played more than normal, and moved up in limits. Expect big things from me! No, I don't know why it's up there twice.

No one sleeps yet!

Let's keep it going, until the morning!